Saturday, April 19, 2008

Pinky and the Buzzcocks

Much as I love animals in general and cats in particular, there are times when I'm filled with a nearly overwhelming urge to hurl Bibi, my 3-year-old ex-male Russian Blue, out the window.

Oh yes, I hear you; he's certainly cute and cuddly. But when he starts a-howling at 4, 5, and 6 am night after night after night, interspecies relations tend to break down a tad.

Still, there's something to be said for the notion that "no matter what your circumstance, someone is better off and worse off than you". Aptly demonstrated by Pinky the cat.

And when English teaching hell begins to fully erode one's sanity, thankfully there is always the opportunity to fuck with one's students' heads. Thus, last week's lesson included a short primer on the clever lyrical wit of the Buzzcocks:

Johnny want fucky always and ALL WAYS
He's got the energy, he will aMAZE,
'cause he's an OR-GASM ADDICT, yes he's an OR-GASM ADDICT
He's always at it.....

Orgasm Addict – The Buzzcocks
Well you tried it just once found it all right for kicks.
But now you found out that it's a habit that sticks.
And you're an orgasm addict. You're an orgasm addict.

Sneaking in the back door with dirty magazines.
Now your mother wants to know what all those stains are on your jeans.
And you're an orgasm addict. You're an orgasm addict.

uh huh, uh huh, uhhhhh [x3]

You get in a heat, you get in a sulk.
But you still keep a-beatin your meat to pulp.
And you're an orgasm addict. You're an orgasm addict.

You're a kid Casanova.
You're no Joseph it's a labour of love
Fucking yourself to death.
Orgasm addict. You're an orgasm addict.

Uh huh, uh huh, uh huhhhhh [x10]

You're makin' out with schoolkids, winos and heads of state.
You even made it with the lady who puts plastic bobins on Christmas cakes.
Butchers' assistants and bellhops, you've had them all here and there.
Children of God and The Joy Strings,
International women with no body hair.

Oooh, so where they're askin' in an alley and your voice ain't steady.
If your sex mechanic's rough you're more than ready.
You're an orgasm addict.
You're an orgasm addict.

Johnny want fuckie always and all ways.
He's got the energy, he will amaze.
And he's an orgasm addict.
He's an orgasm addict.

He's always at it.
He's always at it.
And he's an orgasm addict. He's an orgasm addict.

オルガスム 常用者 -ザ バズコクス




あなたはキッドCasanova です。
あなたは Joseph ではない, 大好きな労動です。


学生, 飲んだくれ,政治家とペッティングしている




Next week, we'll address moral conundrums implicit in "Now I Wanna Be Your Dog", by Iggy and the Stooges, as interpreted by Johnny Rotten and the Sex Pistols. Who says teaching Engrish can't be fun?

Update: Buzzcocks guitarist Pete Shelley has just corrected me on the English lyrics. They reference the British gospel band "The Joy Strings". 'Tis an honor, sir....

Additionally, holy fuck this posthumous tribute to promoter/icon John Peel is the coolest remake ever - "Ever Fallen in Love" guest-starring Roger Fucking Daltry, Robert Fucking Plant, David Fucking Gilmore and Elton Fucking John. That's like virtually half of every single one of my personal Rock and Roll Gods in a single recording (the other half with the exception of Paul Fucking McCartney all being dead)....

Very, very cool....

Update: and lest we forget the timeless, brilliant original:

Friday, April 18, 2008

Random Blatherings

The Temple of Elemental Shite
First, there is the little issue of the D&D PC "tribute" called "The Temple of Elemental Evil".

May the phantom of Gary Gygax forever torment those responsible for foisting this bit of bloated, overpriced snoreware upon a hapless, helpless, undeservedly innocent public. To say it sucks goat balls is being charitable.

Although the graphics, interface, NPC interaction and "action" all respectively bring the genre to hitherto unplumbed depths of inferiority, of particular annoyance are the gratingly fake "British" accents adapted by the voice "actors".

A friend gave me this title, and I am consequently considering never speaking to him again. Was this some act of vengeance for a forgotten slight?

The title was given to me for free, and was vastly overpriced. I want my two hours of life back, you bastards.

A Gratifying Afternoon
Being a gaijin in Tokyo can be tough at times. Before arriving, a friend had warned me that young Japanese men are among some of the world's most notorious bigots, and he was correct.

Having spent time in rural North Carolina, I saw a lot of that kind of crap going down toward blacks, and have been in more than a couple of fights standing up to racist pricks, so when it's directed at me, it pisses me off all the more; but people are people, and the majority are afraid of anything different, so what can you do....

At any rate, the point of this rant is that if you ARE gaijin, the standards to which you're held are quite tough compared to native Japanese. If your conjugation of a single verb is off, it will elicit snickers of disdain from someone who can't even form a coherent sentence in English after some 12 years of constant study. And God forbid you're a few pounds overweight; I spent six months in intense Japanese study, and came out about 30 pounds overweight; think I'm allowed to forget it for a moment?

So I've been hitting the gym hard, and getting damned strong again. I'm two plates away from being able to do the whole stack on the butterfly press and the seated row (140 kg each, around 300 pounds, I believe); the entire stack on the leg press is a breeze (200 kg).

So it was gratifying when Mr. Sakuba, a former judo instructor for the police academy, came up to introduce himself and to tell me "You have a very, very stong body. You should train in judo". He wasn't trying to sell me; he no longer teaches, but was just being kind.

Afterwards, I also met a "rikishi", a professional sumo wrestler. At 5'10, the kid's a mountain. He's 21 and named "Okuma" ("Big Bear"). Pretty cool. He was a little like a kid; very shy, but nice.

At any rate, I sometimes forget what the endorphin flow of hard exercise can do for your moods; life just gets a whole lot better after a hard 5-km run.

I Believe You, Kerry
I remember during the '04 campaign when John Kerry said something to the effect of "These guys are the biggest group of thugs I've ever met", referring, of course, to the Bush gang.

After seeing scandal after scandal after scandal just blow away for these idiots without the slightest consequence, I've grown pretty tired of even discussing it anymore. But I believe Kerry completely, and now am certain that they're engaged in wholesale criminal activities across the board.

For example, remember the scandal where Tom Delay and his office were found to be conducting daytrading in the senator's office? Think the fact that the Bushites want access to every American's banking data and emails is just for fun? Guess again. It';s all about profit and power. Why bother with insider trading when you can just read exactly what everyone's buying and selling without a trace?

And you can bet your ass that when they're out of office, they'll still have access to the info.

Many people are also saying the reason they haven't suffered any consequences for their innumerable criminal acts is that they also keep a list of dirt on all their political enemies. If you've read anything about the dirty tricks of Lee Atwater and Karl Rove, this allegation won't surprise you in the least.

And it's now common knowledge that the CIA has had its proverbial fingers in the drug trade pie for decades; think it's a coincidence that while the most powerful military in history is occupying Afghanistan that its opium profits are at an all-time record high?

If, through whatever hideous twist of fate, McCain manages to win the election in November, the Repugnicants will have realized Rove's hellish fanatasy of securing a chokehold on American political power. And should that come to pass, there will be no turning back; America will never again escape from the shadow of fascism under which it's fallen.

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Eurythmics in Nihongo

I Saved the World Today - Eurythmics
Monday finds you like a bomb
That's been left ticking there too long
You're bleeding
Some days there's nothing left to learn
From the point of no return
You're leaving

Hey Hey I saved the world today
Everybody's happy now
The bad thing's gone away
And everybody's happy now
The good thing's here to stay
Please let it stay

There's a million mouths to feed
and I've got everything I need
I'm breathing
And there's a hurting thing inside
But I've got everything to hide
I'm grieving

Hey Hey I saved the world today
Everybody's happy now
The bad thing's gone away
And everybody's happy now
The good thing's here to stay
Please let it stay

Let it stay Let it stay
Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo the good thing

今日僕は世界を救った ユーリズミックス



Hey, hey今日僕は世界を救った



Hey, hey今日僕は世界を救った

Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo良いこと

Spectacular video here: